Handshaking 101

I have to many times, both in this business world and outside of it, met people who just don’t know how to shake hands. Often you can’t put your finger on it, but you know there is something wrong with this person because of the way he/she shakes hands. Premature hugging is something else, not to be covered here, but likewise as odd.

The result of a bad handshake is that you are forever going to look at that person with a bit of skepticism. “Sure, he delivers on every occasion, but THAT handshake … “ This is just not going to fly. To help you novice handshakers out there here’s a few handshakes you may want to avoid:

1. The sweaty slip – some people have a natural tendency to get sweaty hands and many get them when they are nervous, that’s just normal. It can make shaking hands tricky in stressful situations such as job interviews. However, I think there is no excuse for a wet, slobby handshake. If you get sweaty hands simply dry them on a piece of clothing before shaking someone’s hand. It’s just the only courteous thing to do. 
2. The limp fish - not gripping the other person’s hand firm enough and then shaking from your wrist is a big mistake because the messages I receive about the other person doing that include: ‘I am not confident’ or ‘I am a push-over’. 
3. The pinch – when someone pinches your fingers with their fingers. This is maybe something the Queen does, but has no place in real life. Again, this half-hearted handshake sends me signals like ‘I am not bothered about shaking your hands properly’ or ‘I don’t think you deserve a proper handshake’. 
4. The hand-holder – where the person shaking your hand keeps holding on and thinks he is actually holding hands with you rather than shaking hands. After anything more than 3 shakes my natural instinct tells me to pull my hand back and say ‘let go, why are we holding hands now?’ My mind is then suddenly preoccupied with forcing myself not to pull my hand away, which means I am no longer concentrating on the introduction or anything the other person is saying.
5. The avoider – someone that doesn’t make eye contact when they shake your hand or someone that pulls their hand away too quickly. This again signals to me that they are either under-confident, very shy, or they don’t really want to meet me or shake my hand. 
6. The crushing gripper – when you shake someone’s hand and it feels like they are crushing every single bone in your hand. A hand shake that is too firm will make anyone feel uncomfortable. It makes you think ‘is the person trying to hurt me on purpose?’ and triggers a natural ‘I need to run away’ instinct.